No words today: only lines and colored surfaces.

In 2008. when I began re-learning  how to draw, the most important thing for me was mastering  the technical side of drawing, I was concerned with re-gaining control over pen, I obsessed  over  quality of my lines, I was  trying out different tools and techniques. The more I’ve practiced and the more confident I became the more  my focused shifted to expressing  certain feelings ( joy, happiness and innocence)  in  drawings. And I discovered, to be able to depict such fun, carefree  feelings I need to get myself in the right mood before I start drawing.  I need to feel happy, carefree and playful myself in order to convey same emotions in an image. I’ve also learned that, for the type of imagery I make, it’s very important not to take myself too seriously and to adopt and innocent but slightly off beat sense of humor about everything  (not a hard task for someone who can’t stay on the serious side for very long anyway and thrives on all things silly and oddly funny).

And getting into mood for drawing chubby critters and whimsical doodles turned out to be rather easy and fun process. I would simply start making up silly stories about my imaginary characters like ok, so here is a Wolf, he likes candy and pinstripe suits and  fancies poking Bear with a stick, his main life goal is to bake biggest cupcake in the world and then dive into delicious icing…. and just thinking like that would make me happy and I would start drawing the day away.

Few years back, when I got into photography I got caught up in technical side of it, I wanted to get to know my camera and I wanted to experiment. I was focused on establishing some kind of  picture-taking routine, reserving few hours every day just to go out and shoot (pretty much anything, trees, flowers, people, myself etc) and then edit photos hoping to learn as much as I can.

As I was learning about photography I was also learning about myself and what photography as a medium meant to me and also what kind of feelings and atmosphere  I’d like to express in  photos. Once again,  I found out that getting into a certain mood (or a mindset) in order to take a good photo is more important to me than technical details of photography. And right now I’m in the process of trying to get my self into that “right mood” before setting off to shoot. It’s a process a bit more difficult and complex because, unlike in my illustrations,  I wish to create more serious and complex worlds and to succeed at  it I  feel I need to become a little  more mature, a little more grown-up and wiser myself. To me creative work always seems to end up being (as corny as it may sound) a process of self discovery and self development

Do you need to be in particular mood to be creative or do you just decide you’ll make some art or crafts and do it?

Ever since I read this blog post on self-portraiture (which I highly recommend) I thought of writing something on the topic myself. Why? Well, because I’ve been regularly  shooting selfies for almost 10 years and even though I never considered myself a self-portrait artist, a habit of taking pictures of myself  on almost daily basis became very important part of my creative expression and helped me grow as a person in many ways.

Even though I’ve been the subject of my own photos since 2002. I haven’t started posting my SPs  online until 2007. when I’ve created my first flickr account (that got deleted very quickly) and I’ve always been very selective about  self-portraits I decided to post. Mostly because I was doing it for personal reasons, it was my visual diary, a way to document my life and emotions. Over the years my reason for shooting self-portraits changed and right now I’m in the process of approaching self-portraiture as an art process and not just a personal documentation of my feelings

So, I’d like to share some of my thoughts on self-portraits and   what I’ve learned in last 10 years of being on both sides of the camera:

Being both photographer and model gives you complete control over entire process of creating an image. From  idea to its realization to editing of a photo you posses full control over your work and it’s (at least from my experience) the fastest way to learn and develop your own style. It also a process that gives you complete freedom to express yourself  however you please.

It appears that more than any other genre photographers, self-portrait artist (especially female ones)  feel need to continually explain and even justify their choice of genre. Maybe because of prejudice that shooting pictures of yourself and posting them online (especially if you’re a young woman) makes you narcissistic and vain.

Have you ever heard, for example,  someone calling a singer/songwriter a narcissist just because she performs songs composed by herself? Do singers/songwriters usually apologize for performing their own music? If anything, musicians who write, produce and perform their own music are even more respected for it and considered more talented. Yet, photographers who come up with their own ideas, portray  them by using their own face and body (they own image) and are in full control of entire creative process, are considered vain? It never made much sense to me.

From what I’ve learned shooting SPs is hard work and it takes a lot of imagination to come up with interesting images.  It also sometimes takes a lot of introspection and self-work to be able to continually play a role of a subject in your own photos.

Also, it always seemed more honest and genuine, when expressing a raw intimate emotion or an idea you hold close to your heart, to use yourself as a subject of an image  than using models and trying to direct them.

Taking pics of yourself can be very therapeutic and it can very helpful in any form of self-work and self-discovery. It definitely helped me love and accept my body as it is, I feel very confident and comfortable in my own  skin. The more comfortable I felt in front of the camera, the more accepting I’ve became of my body image. I didn’t start taking pics of myself because I was in love in how I look, I learned to love myself partly  through the creative process of taking SPs. I’ve learned that our body image is just that an image and we can choose to own it and re-create it and better ourselves just as we can with any other aspect of our being.

Do you take self-portraits? What do you think about it?

Do you have a habit of listening to music while drawing/painting/crafting/making art/etc? Is it easier for you to focus on creative work while something is playing in background or do you prefer complete silence? I used to enjoy listening to my favorite records while drawing, it helped to get into the flow and draw for hours and hours at a time.

When I started making first illustrations for the book  I had  OneRepublic  playing on repeat and it was a perfect soundtrack for creating happy, light, simple and cute drawings. Every time I was about to work on the book I would play the same songs and it would help me to set the mood for working and concentrating  on illustrations more easily.

But, after I finished the book I couldn’t find any suitable, enjoyable tunes to listen to while sketching and editing images. Since I’m not a fan of total silence I resorted to watching tv series, Midsomer Murders in particular. Well, I haven’t actually watched  TV, I would kind of simultaneously draw and listen to the show and take a quick glance at the screen every few minutes. After seeing every single episode approximately 5 times  it was time to move on and find another pleasant distraction.

So, I began watching documentaries. Genius of photography was the first series to entertain me while working. I continued by watching various culture, history and politics related documentaries, latter  turning out to be a bad choice of content to expose oneself while trying to create happy, fun, care free worlds   Apparently I got subconsciously influenced by what I was seeing:  suddenly all of my  chubby critters were   looking like world political leaders . Not good.

Currently I’m in a phase of listening to podcasts, topics varying from astronomy to contemporary art and I’m loving it! It suits my efficiency loving nature, I work and at the same time I’m learning new information.

What do you prefer listening to while being creative (if anything at all)? Is there any good  series/ movie/documentary/ podcast to you’d recommend as backdrop for making art?

]]> http://asjaboros.com/2012/02/01/do-you-listen-to-music-when-you-draw/feed/ 5 http://asjaboros.com/2012/01/28/work-in-progress-3/ http://asjaboros.com/2012/01/28/work-in-progress-3/#comments Sat, 28 Jan 2012 14:11:02 +0000 Asja http://asjaboros.com/?p=2536

*Happy weekend everyone*

As I thought of writing this post I said to myself there must be another way to start it than saying I’ve been very busy. It doesn’t sound original or fun  but it’s true! I’ve been very busy working on various projects, some of which I’m not yet allowed to share and a personal art project that still makes sense only in my head and will have to wait awhile until it reveals itself to the world.

However, I did manage to steal a little time to work on simple creative ideas. I’ve been doodling on glossy 200gms photo paper, using colorful, sparkly rollers and expressing my caffeine addiction love for coffee.

I got some cheap coffee mugs at a local store and I’d love to draw something on them as soon as I buy paint for ceramics.  Now I’m just using  them as props.

 For some reason I can’t remember right now I thought it would be fun to make a watermelon necklace. I really love watermelons  and pink/red/green color combo so why not? But, to be honest my every attempt to  make jewelry only reaffirms my decision  to stick to illustration because I kinda suck at  crafting  and lack patience to work on tiny details. I made this by cutting a round cork coaster in half, painting a watermelon on it, then making two tiny holes and putting soft wire through them. I’m using it a as decoration/some sort of mobile right now and will look for actual  watermelon themed jewelry on etsy one day

I had more fun painting bears on cork coasters than making a watermelon “necklace”:

As January is coming to an ending I’m still keeping my motto for 2012. in mind and keeping myself motivated , creative and , yes ,very busy. I can’t wait until I can share results of more exciting projects with you!

Over the weekend I finished these two doodles of food, food doodles, foodles? Anyway, I made them just for fun.
According to this cupcake, baking is very sexy. And this toast is very smart. He’s into important intellectual matters, philosophy and knowing every flag of the world. He’s kinda cute as well, don’t you think?

Latest issue of Maksi magazine (that features my work) came in mail yesterday.

All is well in Asja-land.

As I mentioned before, on Monday night I spilled some ink on orange/pinkish wall in my computer nook and  naively wanted to wash it out with water making an ever bigger stain. You know how it goes, the more you try to clean it the bigger the stain so I thought well, I might just remove all the paint and repaint the wall.

Removing the paint was pretty tedious and messy but, I believe, totally worth it because white suits my little corner so much better and makes it lot brighter.I also rearranged art pieces and put them above my desk, I have quite an Alkaline collection, 6 original pieces by Alkaline Samurai, photo print by Isidora and two of my own pieces.

Also, I repainted my little cabinet white and painted some pink flowers on it, now I call it  sakura cabinet hehe.

Recently I made a little drawing of a bear on a round piece of wood so I thought it would be appropriate to display it as well.

Once I refreshed my computer corner I moved on to the living room and repainted my old wooden wall white. The whole room seems bigger, much brighter and more pleasant to be in.

I have a big, really old closet in my living room that I plan on kicking out very soon so I thought it would be fun to paint on it before it gets moved out. Years ago, on one part of the closet my Mom applied some flowery decoupage that I never liked so I decided to remove it. And I learned a valuable lesson, decoupage is hard and messy impossible to remove but also nothing that 4 coats of white paint and strategically painted blue flowers can’t cover up.

The rest of the closet got some new, blue flowers as well.

After that I painted my kitchen cabinets white as well and did A LOT of cleaning and I’m still in the process of cleaning and rearranging stuff just at a slower pace (it’s weekend after all).

Last weekend I felt like doing something fun yet simple so I played a bit with white watercolor and blue, lined paper getting subtle and understated drawings.

Before that I experimented with dying plain, white paper with coffee and spices to get interesting textures to scan and use as textures for layers in PS. I found my old high school biology homework and though I might scan it as well to get some “objects” to use as PS layers as well.

I also made some simple notebooks to fill with photo ideas, I’ve been writing and sketching so much I already have 4 little notebooks overflowing with ideas!

I rediscover how fun it is to paint on brown paper!

Other great things happened as well in first 2 weeks of new year. I got great news, my partner in crime art and all things awesome is coming to visit in early February and we’re planning to have amazing time together as always. I started looking for props for my soon-to-happen photo shoots and scouted some very inspiring locations. I went to much needed shopping for clothes as I realized my sartorial choices could be described by this. I started working on a wonderful commission and even though I’ve been seriously sleep deprived I’m having a blast! I have a feeling 2012. will be the BEST YEAR EVER!

How did your year start?

I’ve been very, very busy in lately (in best possible way!!) so to break silence on this blog, I decided to re-post one of my older posts from tumblr. I will soon be back with new stuff.

***

Things I wish I knew 10 years ago a.k.a.  twenties suck

Recently I had an honest conversation with a few friends (all of us are in late twenties/early thirties) about how our twenties turned out pretty disappointing and generally sucked and no one warned us about it.

Everyone warns you about adolescence. They tell you it will be awful, they tell you your body, mind and emotions will go on a crazy roll-coaster ride and that life might chew you and spit you out and leave you angsty, confused and sad. They warn you not to make bad decisions, they give you tons of (usually unwanted) advice and assure you that whatever you feel as a teenager eventually it will pass.

But nobody tells you (at least nobody told me) that turning twenty would not magically turn you into a wise adult, that you won’t magically find out who you are and what you want to do with your life. And, that even though society will expect you to act like a responsible, wise adult you won’t be ready for it because you won’t really know where to fit in within that society.
You also won’t feel any less insecure or confused as you did as a teen, you will just feel more awkward admitting it because you’re supposed to be “confident and responsible”. And there is always that friend/cousin/neighbor who’s your age and seems so confident and successful and getting that amazing degree and already having a career and committed relationship etc that makes you feel incompetent and even a bit ashamed that you haven’t even started doing any of that in your life.

From what I’ve learned twenties are a period of finding out who you are and where your place in world is. It a time of soul-searching and self-discovery and experimenting and learning, making mistakes and going through identity crisis and making up you own rules on what success is. And all of that is usually hard work and a struggle which nobody warns you about.

I think this transition and period of self-discovery was particularly hard for my generation because most of us couldn’t bite into “finish college/get a steady,corporate job/ get married/get a loan/make babies” scheme. Most of us have seen our parents go through horrible middle-age crisis due to making wrong decisions in their twenties (getting married too young, being stuck at job they hate, being too stressed, getting ill etc) and we didn’t want to repeat their mistakes.

But, at the same time we haven’t seen many alternative choices especially career wise. I mean, you can make a choice not to get married or have children until you’re totally ready but you still have to get a job and pay the bills.
As one of my friends said “it’s hard enough not to know what you want to do with your life, but finding out and not being able to see how can you possibly manifest your deepest dreams and visions it’s even more frustrating”.

Other frustrating thing was being put under a lot of pressure by older generations who in their twenties already had steady jobs, families and all kinds of commitments and couldn’t understand why we were so reluctant to go down that path right away. It seems that age limits and milestones have moved up to ten years and the process of growing up and maturing is much longer than it was 20-30 years ago.

I wish I knew all this ten years ago so I wouldn’t be so hard on myself and I wouldn’t feel like a failure in situations when I was actually doing great and I would give myself more credit for all of my achievements.
I also wish me and my friends were able to be completely honest to each other few years ago as we are today instead of pretending and going through the process of growing up and self-discovery alone out of fear of being judged by other but I guess, that was all the part of the lesson.

Now, I’m not saying that if you’re nineteen next ten years of your life will be terrible or that that all of my peers had nightmarish twenties, I’ve just came to realize that I had put much more work and energy into self development during that period than I thought I would and it sucked not knowing it was a perfectly normal and natural process of growing up for most of my generation.